.d.
.latest.
.older.
.tell.me.
.sell.me.
.dirt.
.mylove.
.c'mon.
.me.

.sponsor me.
.PLEASE.

2006-03-01 - 1:15 a.m.

"clearlyl now, i tell you man that all i say, is all i am.
for i am nothing but my sins until i learn to cast them in." -pm

there's a lot of noise out there. accosting, drowning, confronting, daring us to hear our real voice. the noise is a bully. the noise is a veil. the noise is a decoy. the noise, a desperate salmon, swimming upstream to spawn.

where does it come from? where is the source of the signal? the signal that radiates illusions of what is real and what is good? the signal that sits atop a tower of fear. a tower of invisibility. a tower of insignificance. what if i don't matter? what if nobody loves me? what if i disappear into time...forgotten?

all of those voices outside of ourselves.

"this paycheck means you deserve happiness."
"this skin color means you deserve access."
"this religion means you deserve salvation."
"this body means you deserve love."

you can't. you won't. you don't. you ain't even.

those shoes you wear. that glitch you bleep. that fixie you ride. that hoodie. that top hat. those striped arm-warmers. that depeche mode remix. that zip code. that business trip. that meeting. that very important thing you had to do just then. your smiling eyes see the world exactly as they want to. a choice of comfort. a choice of least resistance. a choice to not choose. what if i don't matter? what if nobody loves me? what if i disappear into time...forgotten?

surfing life, riding waves of information. shreading through valleys and peaks. finding the moment where you coast without effort. your real voice knowing when it resounds truth. true connection. true happiness. true value. as a human. as an animal. as a mind. as a meter. as an example. close your eyes, you can slow down time and exist inside this moment. this moment of eternity. where you can not change the past and you can not see the future. the moment in which your senses are your god. this moment that is purely unto to you. this moment in which the only voice is yours.

you can. you will. you do. you are so.

< yeah >