i don't even know where we left off.

ben and i smoked pot. and took a road trip. and he passed all of those crucial tests with flying colors. things were easy and sexy. during out stay at the B&B, i had period cramps so severely one night that after walking in circles, doubled over in pain, i lay in a fetal position on the cold, bathroom, tile floor. and in between shifting from pain overload, ben could not wake up out of his sleep web. i was ashamed that i could not manage my breakdown and conquer the pain so it's probably better that he missed it all. but the next morning, i woke up crying from the battle and just felt kinda...raped...alll day. jumpy and fragile. it was very intense.

besides that, ben was a star.

i returned from SF tonight. t will talk about it later. too strange. too good. and not really home right now.

< yeah >