i don't understand anything. it was a typical amazing west coast weekend day. non-stop bbq's and dinner parties ending in the closing party for the odeon. and i really appreciate the west coast for this flow. but... i need to figure out what i want to be when i grow up. and i don't know. and i want a baby soon. but not before a career(that hasn't started yet). and i'm just confused. and i really don't feel like i'm great at anything. sometimes i write something that moves me. and sometimes i get how many amazing connections i have all over this goddamn planet. and i know that is something. but i need something tangible to show for it. i need some proof that i was here and i did a good job being alive.

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